Day 2

I got a text at 4 am this morning (I was already awake because I am used to his alarm going off for seminary) from Joe saying he had finally made it to Beijing. Unfortunately the hotel he was in did not have wireless Internet, and we could not Skype as planned. He was missing me so much that he called on his cell (yikes! $$) to tell me that the time difference was killing him and that he had been showered and dressed by 5 am his time and has since been walking the streets of Beijing. He is taking the train to Shanghai this evening (except it's really tomorrow afternoon in China) and hopes that the Marriott he is staying in will have the Internet.

In  honor of Dad's safe arrival in China we ate jiao zi (potstickers), rice, and stir-fry vegetables for dinner. We then proceeded to play "just dance" where we danced "Kung fu Fighting" several times and we sang the words very loudly. Variations of the word "China" are used many times.

Day two was good, except that Grant refused to eat his Chinese dinner and after threatening him for 15 minutes I had to make good on said threats and I sent him to bed before 7:00. He missed the dancing. Ammon, who I think is teething, has been a real pill lately. After throwing a major temper tantrum because he could not hold the wii remote I gave up and put him in bed and let him cry. After listening to Madison and Logan fight about whose turn it was to choose the Just Dance song I said, "FORGET IT! Go brush your teeth!" At 7:30 I went upstairs, pulled the crying boys out of bed and began reading to them chapter two of "Romona the Pest." We were on the second page when a fight broke out between Grant and Logan about who had the Lego man first and I yelled, "I'm DONE! GET IN BED!"

Among the ordinary things that have to get done everyday, I also went on a 3.5 mile bike ride, babysat 2 cute girls, cleaned the fish tank, read a chapter of A Tale of Two Cities, took a nap, spent an hour playing the piano, and cleaned the kitchen. I appears that my plan is to stay up late deep cleaning and nap during the afternoon. A little backwards, but I do not have the motivation to clean during nap-time because I am so tired from staying up late the night before, and since the evenings are quiet and lonely--I clean until I am exhausted. I'm crazy.

So there is day 2 in a nut shell.

I am now going to go sweep and mop the kitchen and bathroom floors. Evenings are definitely the hardest part of the day.

Firsts

I received 4 bottles of nail polish, one from each child, for my birthday. I guess that means I'm going to start painting my fingernails (I do paint my toenails once in a while). So for the first time in my life (I'm pretty sure) I bought cotton balls and nail-polish remover. If you see me with poorly-painted brightly-colored nails, that is why.

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Today, for the first time in my life, I said "no" when someone asked a favor from me. I feel kind of guilty, but relieved at the same time. On Sunday I decided that part of my sanity plan while Joe was gone was to keep nap time and bedtime as sacred time. So when someone asked me to babysit tonight from 5-10 p.m. I said something like, "I'm sorry, I would normally do it, but I will need the time after my kids go to bed to myself in order to keep my sanity." 

How do you say "no?" 

Communication

In my 31 years of life I have learned that good communication is the key to success.

Knowing is different than doing, as can be evidenced in this story.

As you probably know, this week was teacher appreciation week. The teachers kindly sent out suggestions of what you could do for them each day of the week. Now, I come from a family of teachers, I have a teaching degree, and I am very grateful for the teachers in my children's lives, so I had great intentions of sending something to school each day for the teachers. The first day was a drawing of the teacher doing something the student enjoyed. We had it ready the night before. The rest of the week. . . well, we fell a little behind. Each day the kids would come home saying, "We need to bring this. . . everyone is doing this. . . can we buy?"

So yesterday after school I had the kids write letters (Madi wrote a poem) to their teacher, and then as I was running out the door to the Round Table I asked Joe if he would stop at the store after picking up Logan from Scouts and grab 2 bottles of root bear, some Reese's Peanut Cups, and some strawberries for the teachers.

When I got home I saw this (sorry, no pic): two boxes of thin mints, a 2-liter bottle or A&W, a 2-liter of Sprite, gummy bears, and X-Tremely HOT Pringles. I asked for the story and Joe said, "This is what the kids picked out for their teachers." I made big eyes and said, "Oh! I thought you were going to buy the things on the list they sent." "What list?" "You know, the ones with the strawberries and Reese's?" "Oh, I just thought you wanted them to pick something out for their teachers. I kept asking Logan if he was sure that is what he wanted to send to his teacher, but he insisted (Logan had gotten the chips and gummy bears for the teacher who said she didn't like junk food)." It was totally my lack of communication, and it was already late on a Thursday night, so we went with it.

I intended to recycle a gift bag for the teachers' gifts, but I didn't have anything non-Christmas or babyish for the huge (and heavy) 2 liter of root beer, so Madison took it to school in a Walmart bag. We're cool like that.

When I picked the kids up from school I asked how their gift-giving went. Madison said her teacher didn't give her a hug because her gift wasn't good enough. Logan smiled big and said his teacher wrote him a nice note, longer than anyone else's, and it said, "Your gift is the most surprising gift I have gotten."

I laughed so hard.

Somehow my house has become the after-school neighborhood house. I'm glad. I'd much rather know what they were doing and who was watching them than let them run around the neighborhood.

Madison's soccer get-up. Glad but sad that soccer is over, and are planning on more come fall.

Logan's soccer get-up. Couldn't find his team socks, so he borrowed some of Dad's thin dress socks and put them over some regular soccer socks. Ironically, found the real soccer socks in Dad's dresser drawer the next day. Oops!

31! We went to the temple in the a.m., but forgot to take pictures until after I had changed. We stuck the camera on a book shelf and tried to get a timed-shot. This is the best we could do, unless you want to see the kissy picture. ;) 

Birthday Surprises

I know it's kind of silly, but I love birthdays. It's nice to feel special for a day. I don't just love my birthday, I love to celebrate everyone's birthday. But my birthday just happens to be on Friday, so I've been letting people know. ;)

It's funny how growing up changes things as far as birthdays go. Presents are nice, but they really come out of my own money these days, and so maybe we can call it an excuse to splurge, but in reality I don't have to wait for my birthday, and the money comes from the same place.

These days what I really want are meaningful, well-thought out gestures of love and kindness. I think my children know exactly what I want, as can be evidenced in the conversation I had with Grant yesterday:

Grant: Mom, is it going to be your birthday?
Mom: Yep! Are you going to surprise me?
Grant: Yes, I know what you want for your birthday!
Mom: You do?! What is it?
Grant: A messy house!
Mom: No, I want a clean house. Can you do that for me?
Grant: (laughs) No, but I can give you a messy house. That can be your birthday present.
Mom: How about a clean bedroom? That's easy!
Grant: (laughs)

I might be waiting for many years to get what I want for my birthday. Ah well, at least they will be years full of laughter!

*I should mention that Joe has declared it Mom's week because of my birthday and Mother's Day (and to warm me up to his trip to China, but I'll take it!). I have been spoiled and loved every day. He has been working a little bit from home, and it has been heavenly. He's been making food, cleaning, and telling me to take it easy. We've taken 30 minute bike rides in the morning, today we had a little lunch date at our own kitchen table, and a babysitter during the dinner hour while we ate hamburgers and went for a walk around the lake. I know the next 4 days will be just as wonderful. I am loving every day of Mom's week and hope it becomes a yearly tradition!

A while ago

Madison learned how to ride her bike sans training wheels. This wasn't the first attempt, but we set the date and decided it was going to happen no matter what. We thought it was going to be an ear-splitting, knee-bleeding, whine-fest of an afternoon. But to everyone's surprise--she hopped on and rode down the sidewalk. I guess it's kind of like potty-training: when they're ready, they're ready.

YAY Madison! Here's to many hundreds of hours of bike rides yet to come!

The backyard

While my family was never wealthy, we always had everything we needed, and enough room financially to take vacations and participate in some cool activities. I did not grow up in a big house, or an especially nice house. Actually, I grew up in a very, very old house with one very small bathroom, which I think I've mentioned. We got one fuzzy television station, dial-up Internet when I was a Senior in high school, and my parents didn't believe in Nintendo (they now have a satellite, high speed Internet, and a Wii; in fact, they bought us a Wii).

But we did have a lot of room. . . outside. Acres and acres (100+) of land to hike on, hide on, work on, ride on, and even a creek (it's pronounced "crick") to swim in. 

I can't say I appreciated it very much when I was growing up. I wanted a newer, fancier, bigger house. I wanted sidewalks and shopping centers. I did not want to help to shovel walkways, weed the garden, mow the yard, or feed the sheep. My parents would probably claim that I did not, in fact, do those things. :) I almost despised the 10 trips in and out of the house to bring food to (and from) the picnic table when the kitchen table seemed so much more convenient. 

Today I was watching the kids playing in our small back yard: grateful for the sidewalks, grateful for Joe's 20 minutes to mow the lawn, grateful for the playthings we have been able to provide for the children, grateful for our Craigslist patio table. Somehow, somewhere, I became the mother who appreciated and wanted my children to enjoy the outdoors; it feels wrong to be inside when the sun is shining outside! I also inconveniently drag the food and drinks outside so that we can enjoy the sounds, smells, and feelings of the outside. 

I also miss the room. The house we are living in is much more modern and roomy than the one I grew up in (2.5 baths!), but I am surprised that I miss the room and the quietude that is found in the country. 

Thank goodness for summer vacations.

Grant showing off his Jedi skills. 

Ammon loves the sandbox.

Things to do.

my little garden. crossing my fingers that my plants will stay alive in the Texas heat. 

Logan doing something with cards. 

my growing up backyard. past the deck and down a hill is the creek.  

behind the bushes on the right is a play area for the grandkids. 

my front yard growing up. see the wooded hills? *love*

Home Alone

3 summers ago Joe left for Texas while I held down the fort (and 3 kids) in OH. It was a LONG and emotional summer.

I'm having some deja vu (however you spell that).

Not that I want everyone to know that "HEY, I'm here alone!," so he'll be back tomorrow before he leaves again for. . . . longer than I'd like.

This time it's with 4 kids, but maybe with a little less stress than last time. The next trip is to China, which produces a ton of feelings: nervous for him, scared for me, more than a little envious that he'll be kid-free in a country that I LOVE (leaving me alone with the munchkids)--just a few of my feelings.

Sometimes it is easy for me to start feeling sorry for myself. I become a little kid-like. For example, a few weeks ago Logan was bemoaning his life as the "unluckiest kid in the world." I tried talking some sense into him about kids who didn't have food to eat or a place to sleep, and he said, "yeah, but they get used to that." I started thinking of single moms and how hard they must have it, and I actually thought, "maybe they get used to it." But no, I think it is always hard. At least I know it is for a short amount of time--and I still have a companion to support me and to talk with me. But it is still hard, and I don't look forward to it.

My game plan includes: hiring a babysitter at least once a week so that I can get a break--and some groceries. I get really impatient when there is absolutely no break. I also decided that I am not going to cook. I'm just not. I seriously never buy pre-made meals, but my last 2 shopping trips I started looking around for ideas of things that the kids would eat, that I wouldn't have to spend time making, and that involved very little clean up. I bought things like frozen hamburger patties, hotdogs, frozen pizzas, frozen meatballs (for spaghetti and pre-made sauce), a bag of seasoned fajita meat, pulled pork, pot stickers, sloppy joe in a can, and chili in a can. We are all going to get fat this month. :) The biggest help is that soccer ends tomorrow.

As for soccer, the kids have really improved a ton! Our family home evening on Monday night was about unity, and we went outside and played soccer as a family for a few minutes as part of our lesson. Logan is really good! And after his last practice Madison went out to play against some of the boys on his team, and she took it more seriously than I've ever seen her play--I think she was trying to show off for those boys. They have both asked if they could play again in the fall, and even though it was kind of a a big commitment, I think we are going to do it again. Am I crazy??

So what do YOU do when the days feel long and lonely? How do you stay sane and patient? Do you go to bed early or whittle the hours away?

On educating my children

The thing that sets me off faster than anything else is the idea that men are somehow better than women. People who imply that idea through their words or actions are guaranteed to receive my full-blown fury.

Madison and I happen to live in a house full of boys. I love them all dearly, but that attitude is sometimes thrown around. You can imagine my dismay when, yesterday, I heard Logan and Grant harassing Madison by giving her reasons that boys were better than girls. 

"Boys go to college to get more knowledge. Girls go to Jupiter to get more stupider."

So I sat those 3 kids down and had a chat. 

I explained that, first of all, there are more girls than boys in college. Their mother is also a girl with a college degree. Next, stupider is not a word. And finally, no person has ever been to Jupiter, but if girls are the first to go to Jupiter it will be another proof of their intelligence and capability. 

But MOST importantly: I better never hear my sons say anything that would imply that boys are better than girls. 

I'm almost certain that I haven't heard the end of it.

Logan's germ experiment. Samples taken from his mouth, the floor, and the garbage can. He wanted to keep it. I told him we'd take a picture so he could throw it away. Gag. 

Ammon, Grant, and I went to eat lunch and play with Madison at school. 

Ammon and Madi's purse. 

Random

*My house is a disaster. Seriously. If you ever want to feel good about the state of your home, stop by on a Monday after everyone has been home for the weekend. I might not let you in.

*Last night Joe made the BEST brownies from scratch. You know how you make brownies and think that it's too bad that the boxed brownies are actually better than the from scratch brownies? No more! No more brownies, either--even after he tripled the recipe. We did give about half of them away, but I definitely ate more than anyone else in the family. What makes them so good? It's all about proportions: 1/2 c flour, 1 c sugar, and 1 stick butter. Yeah. . . maybe you should stick to the boxes.

*I have discovered the Amazon penny books. This is especially tempting when it comes to church books I would like to read that I cannot check out of the local library. It is also especially misleading because I have to pay $3.99 in shipping. . . and that adds up quickly! I also get some sort of high(? or something?) out of getting something in the mail. I think I will set the rule that I can order only one book at a time, and I have to read it before ordering another one.

*It appears that Ammon has either an allergy to milk or to the lactose in the milk. If you have any experience or knowledge with this, I would love to hear your ideas.

Here are the facts: I always drank and ate milk products during the year I was exclusively breastfeeding Ammon, and my milk never seemed to bother him. I began introducing whole milk at about 11 months, but only a few ounces a day. At 12 months I was nursing him twice a day, but he was drinking about 16 oz of whole milk daily. He started pooping 8-10 times a day, and even though I tried to change his diaper immediately he had a bad diaper rash. We took him off of milk and his bottom cleared up. We introduced lactose-free milk and his bottom stayed rash-free. He ate small amounts of cheese without problem. Last week I cut back nursing to once a day, and on those days we had casseroles and pizza--which had cheese on them. The rash returned.

So here are my questions:

• Is there a relationship between my weaning him and his development of a lactose intolerance? 
• I have heard about young children growing out of allergies. Can you grow out of a lactose intolerance? 
• Is the intolerance doing more to his body than presenting itself in the form of a diaper rash? 

Again, would love to know your thoughts.

*And finally, a tidbit of TMI. There are some good and bad things that happen each time the nursing of a child comes to a close. Breast-feeding is a wonderful opportunity to bond with my baby, and one of the only times I feel ok about sitting down to read, chatting on the phone, closing my eyes, or gazing into my baby's eyes. I always feel a little sad when that chapter of life is over. I also feel like I can eat a few extra calories during the day when I am breast-feeding. The end of breast-feeding means I have the opportunity to fast--the first time in almost 2 years. I always feel excitement about this spiritual uplift, but forget how hard it is to deprive my body of food for 24 hours. And let's not forget the changing of hormones. Our bodies go through SO much! But probably one of the hardest things about not breast feeding is the way my body changes (you women know exactly what I am talking about). It is sometimes hard to look in the mirror and see the stretched out, saggy skin caused by pregnancy and, yes, breast-feeding. All I can say is thank goodness for modern technology in women's clothing.*


* This also reminds me: it has been getting quite warm in TX--last week we had temperatures in the 90's. There were a couple of moms at the kid's soccer games wearing ridiculously short shorts and skin-tight tube tops. It was awkward. You know what? Moms should not be wearing short shorts and revealing tops. I don't care what religion you are, it's not sexy. It looks ridiculous! 

Sometimes you just have to laugh a little.

*When I gave her a funny face she said, "what? girls always wear tights under shorts." I did tell her she had to change her shoes before biking.

Not so deep thoughts

I'm bummed that more of you don't read. . . or that you didn't leave me a comment telling me what you are reading. Oh well. I just started reading Laura Hillenbrand's new book, Unbroken: A World War II Story of Survival, Resilience, and Redemtion. It is really good, but then I love learning about WW II. Even my mom says she has a hard time believing that, but it's true. I am especially interested in the Home Front aspects of that war, but that is another discussion for another day.

Besides reading, I have been spending a lot of time on my new bike!! Do you know why I haven't ridden a bike in almost 20 years? Because my mom and dad bought me a bike when I turned 12 or 13. .  . and then they made this rule that I had to wear a helmet. I said no thanks and chose not to ride my new bike ever again.

These days helmets are pretty cool. Too bad Ammon doesn't really think so. Oh, he looks happy enough in this picture, I know. I think at first he thought it was cool to be a big kid with a helmet like big brothers' and sister's. But when it comes down to wearing that big heavy thing for an hour while mom pulls you around--not so much. 

 This is a pretty sweet ride, if I do say so myself. The older kids were lamenting the unfairness that they never got to ride in a bike trailer. Oh well, me neither.

I just have to take a minute to tell you about why I got a bike. With our REI dividend and 20% off coupon we had to buy something by April 15. And my birthday is May 11 (hint hint), so I subtly suggested that maybe I needed a bike for my birthday. We got it for almost half the price, so it was a great deal. I dream about going on day-long bike rides with my one true love. But we all know that with little kids it will not happen enough to make the bike worth it, so we saw this trailer on super sail at Target and grabbed it. I just remembered that I forgot to mention that Madi can now ride her bike sans training-wheels! With the help of this trailer we were able to take a short family bike ride on Saturday. So FUN!

The trailer is surprisingly easy to pull, although I can definitely feel the weight going up the smallest of hills. When I get back from our 3 mile loop my legs feel like jelly. I figure I have another week or two before it is just too hot. Boo.

Ah yes, here you see what Ammon really thinks of the helmet. Yesterday he cried for about 20 minutes before falling asleep. Today it was 5 minutes.


















And here are some random pics. Madison asked Joe to hold her like a baby. Of course we pull out the camera (I've been using the one on my phone, sorry for the poor resolution) and Madi wants a turn to take a picture. So this is what we look like at 6:45ish on a school morning. Joe in his suit and tie, Madi ready for school, and Mom would never go out like this in public.

Changes

After serving in the Young Women's presidency for over two years in two different wards, I have been released. I am sad and relieved all rolled into one headachy ball. Figure that out.

I am now serving as the second counselor in the Primary presidency. I think it is going to be a nice change.

Maybe I will have more time to do something I love. . . READ! I'd love to hear what you are reading right now. Put it in the comment box!

PS. Week one without facebook, and it hasn't really been that hard. I did have to briefly activate my account so that I could get some information on there, but I wasn't even tempted to try and catch up. On and off within 10 minutes. My plan right now is to get through April, and then possibly reactivate in May, but only check it once a week. :/