Table Talk

I love hot breakfasts, and I don't care for cold cereal. But since Joe started teaching seminary at 6:00 a.m. every morning, we have been eating cold cereal at least once a week. The kids happen to love cold cereal: it is fast, the kids eat it quickly and without complaint, and the boxes inspire a game they call "nutrition facts."

The kids each take a box and ask, "How many calories? How many sodiums?" You get the idea.

This morning, Madison looks at her "Kix," box and asks, "How many coppers?"

Grant, cute boy that he is, shouts, "Sixty!"

Madison gasps and says, "Ohhhh! Grant said S-E-X!"

Joe and I look at each other, trying not to laugh.

Logan says, "No, he said 'sexy.'"

The kids were kind of laughing and joking, and Joe and I were trying to be serious, and I said, "This isn't really something we should be laughing about. Do you know what the word 'sex' means?"

Quiet.

"Madison?"

"No."

"Logan?"

"No."

I look at Joe, because he was the one assigned to give Logan the talk when he turned 8. Joe nods his head to me, reaffirming that, yes, Logan should know what the word 'sex' means.

"Logan, do you remember when Dad took you to the pet store and you talked about how babies were made?"

Logan nods "yes."

"That is what sex is."

With big eyes and a red face, Logan ducks his head under the table.

I look at Madison and ask her something about hearing the word sex at school.

She looks at me very straight-faced and says, "I didn't say s-e-x, I said s-O-x."

Joe and I are having a very hard time holding it in right now.

"Madison, we know that isn't what you spelled. It's ok, we want to talk about it."

"I don't even know how babies are made!"

"Well, you know it takes a mommy and a daddy, right? They each have a special part that they use to make babies. It is something very special, and we don't make jokes about it. You know what? We will have to talk about this sometime when we aren't going to be late for school."

Grant pipes in, "I said 'SIXTY!'"


And this, my friends, is why families should eat together.


Also, it looks like we will be having the talk a little earlier than originally anticipated.

This is an old pic, but I was trying to find one of our table, and I found this, and it was almost as funny as what happened this morning. 

being a girl is hard

This is one of those topics that I've wanted to talk about for a long time, but it's not an easy one to bring up.

Also, for the record, being a boy is probably hard too, but I just don't know very much about it, as I am not a boy. Maybe that is why Heavenly Father gave me 3 little boys. Or maybe it is so I can teach them right, so that some other girl's life doesn't have to be so hard.

I have always assumed that other women have had similar experiences to those that I have had. I realize this may or may not be true, but I do know that as I have opened up to others, and as I have come to know more people, that my experiences are not unique or uncommon.

I think it is safe to say that all girls feel at times that they are unattractive, or ugly. Without doubt, we all have physical features that that take us longer to embrace and love.

I can remember a specific moment in time that took place in ninth grade, after 4th period, and before lunch. I went to the girl's bathroom, and as I washed my hands and looked into the mirror, I felt so incredibly sad that people had to look at me. I remember wiping the silent tears off my cheeks, honestly feeling that I must be the ugliest person that God had ever created.

As an adult, I've wondered from where this self-hatred came. Hormones? Physical changes that I didn't understand? Uncertainty in my purpose of life? I have no doubt that those are real contributors to why adolescence is so difficult. But there were also the comments: how small my chest was. Where my chest was placed on my body. Shoe size. How clothes fit. How my hair looked. The amount of makeup I wore. These comments usually (although not always) came from boys. Of course, there are always the comments we hear about other girls: chest sizes, bottoms, legs, clothing, what they were willing to do. You know the comments, you've heard them.

It is not hard to understand that a girl quickly assumes that the only thing that gives her value is how she looks, or doesn't look. Also, if a girl wants attention, she should act ditzy, because then people will laugh and make comments about the girl's silliness. I've often wondered if my increased seriousness is a result of my pretended ditziness.

I ran cross-country in high school. I felt flattered when I figured out that the boys would run with me, and then hold back just a little so that they could watch me run in front of them. I am embarrassed just thinking about it.

Luckily, I made it through those ugly teenage years, and I met a wonderful man who reminds me daily of not only how beautiful I am, but also my intelligence and all that I am capable of doing. (Although, he did question my intelligence when, just a few weeks ago, I told him about my moment in the girl's bathroom. I guess boys really don't understand. :)

Not long ago, I took Logan to a plastic surgeon to have the stitches taken out of his eyelid. The office was filled with pictures of gorgeous women with little notes about how plastic surgery could lift eyebrows, tuck wrinkly skin, fatten cheeks and chins, enlarge lips, nip off a little of one's nose. I have to admit, I started thinking about what changes I would make: the nose, most definitely. And wider cheekbones. And. . . And. . .


 (I am including this picture because it shows my nose in profile, which I have not-so-fondly termed my hook nose. Grant happens to have my nose, and I apologize to him for this misfortune more often that I'd like to admit.)

Last week some of you saw my facebook post about leg-shaving. I'm ok with shaved legs, but I admit, I always have that nagging feeling, making me wonder if I am shaving my legs because of my insecurities, or for someone else who would judge me by my appearance. The only one I should shave my legs for is me. (I guess I am ok with shaving my legs for Joe, too, but he darn well better love me no matter what!) Does that make sense?

My little Madison, at age 7, has been hiding her legs for the past year, at least, because she is embarrassed of her hairy legs. A classmate made a comment. Recently she has started to ask me if she looks fat. I have to admit: I'm scared. I don't want her to feel how I felt. I don't want her to feel like she needs to compromise herself in anyway to find acceptance and love from her peers. And I don't want my insecurities to play a role (surely she takes note every time I say something about how gross I look, or my own hairy legs, or the belly fat I try to hide).

I do not want my sons to make some foolish comment that will make a girl question her worth.

I don't know how to solve this, except to make people aware, and to teach our children. Teach them that they are beautiful exactly as they are. And to help them find ways to feel value in who they are--in their talents, their intelligence, and in the knowledge that they are God's own royal offspring. To teach them that we don't judge people, especially by what they look like--and most definitely, "if you can't say anything nice, then don't say anything at all."  Talk. Listen to your children and form a bond of trust so that when something happens (and it will) they will come to you and talk. 

They really do love each other

 Two blog posts in one week. Whoa!

I think it is very important to note that, despite the fighting and yelling that seem to be so common-place in our home, our kids might actually care for each other.

Examples from Friday:

1. Madison and Logan's school is closer than Grant's school, and they get home about 10 minutes before he does. Everyday, Grant gets home and asks if he beat the big kids home from school--and every day he is disappointed. When the kids got home on Friday they came in for their after-school snacks as usual, and I got my shoes on to go wait at Grant's bus stop. Logan and Madi whispered together for a minute, grabbed their backpacks, and hid in the backyard. Grant and I walked in the house and Grant asked, "Did I beat Madi and Logan?" Right on cue, Madi and Logan walked in the door with surprised looks and words like, "What? You beat us home?" Grant squealed in delight and kept saying, "Can you believe it?!" That was the first thing he told Dad when he came home, too. Needless to say, I was touched by their small act of love for Grant.

2. Madison got to take a stuffed animal to school on Friday. She chose a pink bunny. As she walked in the door of our home that afternoon, she burst into tears saying, "Someone on the bus told me that my bunny was stupid." Logan rushed over to her side and gave her a hug. He asked, "Who said that? Was it _______? Well, he's wrong. Everyone thought your bunny was so cute. You chose a good animal to take to school." Again, I was thankful for this act of kindness. This is not the first time Logan has come to Madison's defense, and I hope they can continue to confide in each other throughout their teenage years.

3. Madison had soccer practice Friday evening, and dad was home in time, so we all went to practice together. When it was time to go, Grant hopped in the car first and therefore had the seat of his choice. Madison was furious, and she started whining and crying--and absolutely refused to sit in another seat. In a very nice voice, Dad asked Madison to come talk to him on the sidewalk. I didn't know what was said at the time, but apparently he told her she had the choice of choosing a different seat or walking home. Madison started walking (this sounds a lot like her mother). Dad shut the van doors, climbed in, and put the van in reverse. Grant started bawling, saying, "Nooooo! Don't leave her!! Please don't leave her!!" Madison, seeing that the car was backing up, turned and sprinted back. Grant, still crying, said, "Madi, please go home with us. You can have my seat." I think we all felt this was a successful lesson.

4. Let's not forget Ammon (and although this probably did happen on Friday, it is not a specific incident). Ammon has been trying to fit in with the big kids, and one of the ways he gets attention from them is to bite them. He has been spending a few minutes on the naughty floor everyday. Anyway, after doing something naughty and then spending his 1 minute in time-out, we get down to his level, look him in the eye, and say something like, "Ammon, biting is not nice. You hurt Grant. No biting. Go tell Grant that you are sorry." Ammon, looking very penitent, goes over to the person he offended and gives him or her a big hug. (It really is very adorable.) The hurt child hugs Ammon back and instantly forgives little brother.

And finally, I want to note that not only is the pantry clean. . . but the garage is clean!! We could even  park in it! The problem is that there is no garage door opener, which makes opening the garage door a huge pain. :( Anyway, I bought shelving Lowes, we worked together to tidy up the garage, and it looks wonderful! Towards the end, Madison found some big papers that came from the shelving box, and she asked me if she could have them. Of course, I said yes. And I'm so glad I did! This is what she did with them:

Notice Joe's crown, and the rest of us in a row.

Dad Thank you for all the hard work you dun for us! You are great! Who is the best? You are! The best dad ever! You are made for me! Love it! That's right!

Mom thank you for all the hard work you dun for us! You are the best! I love you! You are a mom! Better than anyone! That's right!

Notice that I am holding the baby Ammon, also, all the peace signs. 

Joe said he got a little emotional reading his sign. 

Truly, being part of a family is a wonderful, wonderful experience. 

Family of 6, or, Proof

In today's world, a family of six seems pretty big. In the Mormon world, a family of six is pretty normal. But sometimes I wonder who in the world gave me permission to be in charge of the souls of FOUR children?

Anyway. A family of six can do a many things together. Some of those things include food ingestion (lots and lots of food), and inevitable unorganization.

Today I am documenting that my pantry is FULL and ORGANIZED.


I can promise you that it won't stay that way for very long.

This food will go fast! 

Earlier in the week I went into panic mode as I started reading about how groceries and gas are supposed to increase significantly this month. Lots of people=lots of groceries=lots of $$$ (hence the Aldi off-brand everything). Joe and I talked, and we agreed that we needed to follow our prophet's advice and prepare for the future in the form of food storage. We got on the LDS Provident Living site and decided we should see what it would take to have 3 months of food storage for our family of six.

Just the very, very basics include:



600 lbs of grain (eeks!)
80 lbs of legumes (I think we would all have stomach issues if this were our only protein source!)
40 lbs of dairy
80 lbs of sugar
8 lbs of leavening (very doable)
8 lbs of salt (this I can definitely do!)
40 lbs of fats

Let's be honest--that's a lot of food. And it isn't going to be that fulfilling if that is all we are eating for 3 months!

Those buckets are filled with wheat, rice, and oats. . . but probably less than 200 pounds worth. 

It is all a little overwhelming, really. So we filled up the pantry (and the deep freeze, but no pic) and we set a date to go to the cannery next month.

I think we can fit a little more in there. . . maybe? We are definitely going to have to get creative with food-storage space around the house. :)

Oh, and did you know that if something terrible should happen, even Ammon would be able to feed himself? He knows right where the cereal is, where his milk is, and he can get to both. However, this does mean a mess for mom is she isn't paying close attention. :/

How do you do food storage?