Random

*My house is a disaster. Seriously. If you ever want to feel good about the state of your home, stop by on a Monday after everyone has been home for the weekend. I might not let you in.

*Last night Joe made the BEST brownies from scratch. You know how you make brownies and think that it's too bad that the boxed brownies are actually better than the from scratch brownies? No more! No more brownies, either--even after he tripled the recipe. We did give about half of them away, but I definitely ate more than anyone else in the family. What makes them so good? It's all about proportions: 1/2 c flour, 1 c sugar, and 1 stick butter. Yeah. . . maybe you should stick to the boxes.

*I have discovered the Amazon penny books. This is especially tempting when it comes to church books I would like to read that I cannot check out of the local library. It is also especially misleading because I have to pay $3.99 in shipping. . . and that adds up quickly! I also get some sort of high(? or something?) out of getting something in the mail. I think I will set the rule that I can order only one book at a time, and I have to read it before ordering another one.

*It appears that Ammon has either an allergy to milk or to the lactose in the milk. If you have any experience or knowledge with this, I would love to hear your ideas.

Here are the facts: I always drank and ate milk products during the year I was exclusively breastfeeding Ammon, and my milk never seemed to bother him. I began introducing whole milk at about 11 months, but only a few ounces a day. At 12 months I was nursing him twice a day, but he was drinking about 16 oz of whole milk daily. He started pooping 8-10 times a day, and even though I tried to change his diaper immediately he had a bad diaper rash. We took him off of milk and his bottom cleared up. We introduced lactose-free milk and his bottom stayed rash-free. He ate small amounts of cheese without problem. Last week I cut back nursing to once a day, and on those days we had casseroles and pizza--which had cheese on them. The rash returned.

So here are my questions:

• Is there a relationship between my weaning him and his development of a lactose intolerance? 
• I have heard about young children growing out of allergies. Can you grow out of a lactose intolerance? 
• Is the intolerance doing more to his body than presenting itself in the form of a diaper rash? 

Again, would love to know your thoughts.

*And finally, a tidbit of TMI. There are some good and bad things that happen each time the nursing of a child comes to a close. Breast-feeding is a wonderful opportunity to bond with my baby, and one of the only times I feel ok about sitting down to read, chatting on the phone, closing my eyes, or gazing into my baby's eyes. I always feel a little sad when that chapter of life is over. I also feel like I can eat a few extra calories during the day when I am breast-feeding. The end of breast-feeding means I have the opportunity to fast--the first time in almost 2 years. I always feel excitement about this spiritual uplift, but forget how hard it is to deprive my body of food for 24 hours. And let's not forget the changing of hormones. Our bodies go through SO much! But probably one of the hardest things about not breast feeding is the way my body changes (you women know exactly what I am talking about). It is sometimes hard to look in the mirror and see the stretched out, saggy skin caused by pregnancy and, yes, breast-feeding. All I can say is thank goodness for modern technology in women's clothing.*


* This also reminds me: it has been getting quite warm in TX--last week we had temperatures in the 90's. There were a couple of moms at the kid's soccer games wearing ridiculously short shorts and skin-tight tube tops. It was awkward. You know what? Moms should not be wearing short shorts and revealing tops. I don't care what religion you are, it's not sexy. It looks ridiculous! 

Sometimes you just have to laugh a little.

*When I gave her a funny face she said, "what? girls always wear tights under shorts." I did tell her she had to change her shoes before biking.

Not so deep thoughts

I'm bummed that more of you don't read. . . or that you didn't leave me a comment telling me what you are reading. Oh well. I just started reading Laura Hillenbrand's new book, Unbroken: A World War II Story of Survival, Resilience, and Redemtion. It is really good, but then I love learning about WW II. Even my mom says she has a hard time believing that, but it's true. I am especially interested in the Home Front aspects of that war, but that is another discussion for another day.

Besides reading, I have been spending a lot of time on my new bike!! Do you know why I haven't ridden a bike in almost 20 years? Because my mom and dad bought me a bike when I turned 12 or 13. .  . and then they made this rule that I had to wear a helmet. I said no thanks and chose not to ride my new bike ever again.

These days helmets are pretty cool. Too bad Ammon doesn't really think so. Oh, he looks happy enough in this picture, I know. I think at first he thought it was cool to be a big kid with a helmet like big brothers' and sister's. But when it comes down to wearing that big heavy thing for an hour while mom pulls you around--not so much. 

 This is a pretty sweet ride, if I do say so myself. The older kids were lamenting the unfairness that they never got to ride in a bike trailer. Oh well, me neither.

I just have to take a minute to tell you about why I got a bike. With our REI dividend and 20% off coupon we had to buy something by April 15. And my birthday is May 11 (hint hint), so I subtly suggested that maybe I needed a bike for my birthday. We got it for almost half the price, so it was a great deal. I dream about going on day-long bike rides with my one true love. But we all know that with little kids it will not happen enough to make the bike worth it, so we saw this trailer on super sail at Target and grabbed it. I just remembered that I forgot to mention that Madi can now ride her bike sans training-wheels! With the help of this trailer we were able to take a short family bike ride on Saturday. So FUN!

The trailer is surprisingly easy to pull, although I can definitely feel the weight going up the smallest of hills. When I get back from our 3 mile loop my legs feel like jelly. I figure I have another week or two before it is just too hot. Boo.

Ah yes, here you see what Ammon really thinks of the helmet. Yesterday he cried for about 20 minutes before falling asleep. Today it was 5 minutes.


















And here are some random pics. Madison asked Joe to hold her like a baby. Of course we pull out the camera (I've been using the one on my phone, sorry for the poor resolution) and Madi wants a turn to take a picture. So this is what we look like at 6:45ish on a school morning. Joe in his suit and tie, Madi ready for school, and Mom would never go out like this in public.

Changes

After serving in the Young Women's presidency for over two years in two different wards, I have been released. I am sad and relieved all rolled into one headachy ball. Figure that out.

I am now serving as the second counselor in the Primary presidency. I think it is going to be a nice change.

Maybe I will have more time to do something I love. . . READ! I'd love to hear what you are reading right now. Put it in the comment box!

PS. Week one without facebook, and it hasn't really been that hard. I did have to briefly activate my account so that I could get some information on there, but I wasn't even tempted to try and catch up. On and off within 10 minutes. My plan right now is to get through April, and then possibly reactivate in May, but only check it once a week. :/

Divide and Conquer

I don't know how it works at your house, but at our house, the ideal evening routine goes something like this:

Mom gets kids bathed and in jammies before dinner.
Dad gets home.
Dinner.

Divide and Conquer: One parent cleans up dinner while the other parent helps with bedtime routines and upstairs pick-up.

Kids are in bed by 8:00 and house is returned to a somewhat less-chaotic state.

Tonight Joe chose clean-up. I hollered throughout the house that it was time for family prayer. (Sometimes it takes a few hollers.) Ammon, Grant, and Mom and Dad were waiting on the two stragglers, and Dad rubbed his tired eyes and said, "My eyeballs are falling out." Grant looked up with a mixture of wonder and concern and said, "Can I see?"


******************

More celebrating:

*I got this bike!!

*I can ride it!! (It's been at least 17 years.)

Things to Celebrate this Week:

*The taxes are done.
*After days of searching, the internet remote for the t.v. was found in the Lego box. At 6 a.m.
*Pinewood car has met the weight requirement and we can no longer work on it.
*The Pinewood Derby will be over with tomorrow.
*Moments of silence.

picture of the day

*the diaper box is my lost sock box. ignore it.

**yes, he is wearing the same shorts that he wore yesterday. clean clothes

are overrated.

Grouchy

I'm grouchy today.

Grouchy that the house is a mess.
Grouchy because I am going to be the one who has to clean it.
Grouchy that no matter how much time she has, Madison will not get ready for school on time.
Grouchy Grouchy because I'm extremely unhappy about what will be happening in the month of May. (Ask me in person and I'll explain)
Grouchy because of hormones.
Grouchy.

At least I have this: 

(*and yes, I let him go like this when we went to take a late Madison to school)

And this:

"Once upon a time a cowgirl had a fast horse. She livd whith her mom and dad and her crazy dog in the whest. One day a stranger followde a path to her house. He askted her to go with him. She rilly dident want to go bot he said if she dident he wod shoot her. Her mom and dad herd him so thay ran out and got thare guns in thare hands. He was about to shoot her but her dad got in front of her and said do not shoot my doter. The next day it was her birthay he came back and ges what she said she said she wants to marry him they livd happy ever after. The Eend."  (Madison)

awkward family photos

The other day I was in the kitchen and I heard Joe laughing hysterically. I kept asking what was so funny, and finally I went to find out what the hilarity was all about.

http://awkwardfamilyphotos.com/

They were funny, but not that funny.

Anyway, I was looking through our pictures while waiting for Joe to finish up some work, and decided we had some of our own awkward photos.

(from the girls' camp fundraiser)

"Where's the real one?" you ask.

They all look like this. :)

Which one would you vote for?

Scary Stories

1. A few weeks ago I was getting in my car at the Walmart parking lot when I noticed the car parked in front of me had two men sitting in the front seat. When I saw one of the men pointing out at me I hurried to get in my car and locked the doors. One of the guys came and knocked on my window. I asked him what he wanted through the glass. He asked me to open my door, I said, "What do you need?" He told me that their car was dead and they needed a jump. I explained (through the glass) that I didn't have jumper cables. He said they did and asked me to get out. I have heard too many bad stories that started this way, so I said, "no" and told him I needed to leave to pick up my son. Who knows, maybe I turned down an opportunity to help someone, but I didn't feel safe.

2. Today I left the elementary school and a silver car with a sun-roof pulled out behind me. I didn't think anything of it until it made the same 3 turns I did. I turned onto a road that turns back onto the road I was already on, the car followed. I thought that was strange, and the car continued to follow me very closely as I continued to turn on roads leading back to my house. I started to think maybe the car was following me, so I drove past my road and turned onto a different road. He followed. My body started to literally shake as I realized that this man was following me. For probably 5-10 minutes I was turning onto every road, speeding, trying to follow the advice given on "Burn Notice" (kind of funny now) for how to lose someone. I went 45 mi/hr on 30/hr neighborhood roads, turning as often as I could. Finally, I could not see the car behind me, so I drove out to a main road, and the guy drove past me and looked right at me and smiled. Then he turned at the next opportunity and got behind me. I finally went to a public parking spot, and I didn't see him anymore. The boys and I went into a small restaurant for lunch and I kept looking out the window, hoping not to see this silver car. I called Joe and he asked my why I didn't call the police; I explained that I felt like a paranoid girl calling the police to say someone was following me--but I KNOW without a doubt that he was. I did finally call the police so that they could make a note of it in case I see the guy or his car again. I hurried in the house and locked all the doors, shut and locked all the windows. I'm nervous to let the kids play outside today. I never drove by the house, but that guy followed me all over the neighborhoods around here--what if he comes back to look for our van? We haven't been parking in the garage because there are too many bikes/scooters/ toys. . . but maybe we will have to figure out a way to park in there. 

Who knows--maybe the guy saw our BYU license plate and wanted to ask me about being a Mormon. . . but I tell you what, I am still shaking, and it's been almost 2 hours.

On the way home from the police station a silver car with a sunroof was behind me, and I started worrying that somehow he was still following me--even from the police station. 

Someone knocked on the door after we got home--probably some salesperson--but I took the boys in our upstairs closet and shut all the doors in-between, hoping the people outside couldn't hear our noise. 

This is no way to live. 

I need to invest in some Mace or self-defense classes. 

On a Break

Dear Facebook,

It's not you, it's me. I like you too much, and it's time to step back and reevaluate. You are great, really. I love hearing from friends and seeing pictures of their babies. I enjoy talking with the women in the Quad 4 group--we support and help each other. I like the convenience of sending messages to groups of people--you can't have group conversations with email. At least not so easily. You even support my religion by letting me share (and find) clips and talks I find inspiring.  It is fun to celebrate successes with friends, and sometimes I learn about friends who are hurting and in need of support.

But it's time for me to let go. I need to actually celebrate and help people. I should be helping kids with homework instead of straining my eyes on the phone while sitting next to them. One day I spent hours with you arguing, defending mothers who work at home instead of actually getting my work done. If I had to define a breaking point, that was it. I have also been thinking of me. I need time to be me, to figure out me, to do the things I've always wanted to do.

I still want to be friends, but give me a while.

Thanks for understanding.

Love,
Jenn

*You can always find me here. Leave a comment, send me an email, call me on the phone.

Quarterly Review

Can you believe that we're already 1/4 of the way through 2012? No way! It's getting hot in Dallas, and while I don't want to wish my time away, I am not so excited about the next 3 months' weather.

I recently read a book by Linda Eyre called "A Joyful Mother of Children." I think I must have needed some lifting up, because I went on a search for books about motherhood and women in general. I love being a mom, but it can be very demanding and wearing with few breaks. Another book I got (same author) is called "I Didn't Plan to Be a Witch." Can you tell what I think I need to work on? LOL. Anyway, one concept I really appreciated was that she talks about how hard it is to cut wood with a dull saw--instead of spending so much time ineffectively cutting we should take a few minutes to sharpen it so that the work is better and more efficient--now relate to being a mom (or to anything you do). So I've been pondering my New Year's goals, how I've been doing, and thinking about the things I would like to start doing or doing differently.

• I got  Logan and Madison signed up for soccer (Check)
• Still working on the preschool for Grant (hopefully will know by the end of the week)
• Pretty consistent at giving Joe a kissaroo when he gets home from work.
• Piano lessons. . . definitely more consistent than previously, but could do better. My goal is once a week, it's been more like twice a month. 

I had some other goals written down(optimism, gratitude, and serviceable) but those are less check-offable, and traits that I am constantly striving to achieve. I still have a long ways to go. :)

Some things to sharpen my saw:

• Exercise for 40 min 4 days a week. (My goals is to do this during nap-time. Some weeks I keep up, some weeks not so good.)
• Be in a book club. (I actually started one this month and we have it scheduled through Dec. Yay!)
• Write an old-fashioned letter each week. (Molly--you are first on my list.) 
• Go to bed earlier. (I am pretty sure the best thing I can do for my family and for myself, but SO hard to do!)
• Learn to play Claire de Lune. 

Yeah, there are many more areas of improvement, but this will be enough to work on for now. :)