27 weeks 3 days

I think this is my first selfie; it's blurry and I feel silly. But--I haven't done a picture for several weeks and I want to remember what I looked like when I was pregnant. 

First: a story. The kids have been jiggling my belly and talking and singing to the baby. It's been fun to be able to talk to them each week about how the baby is growing and the neat tricks he can do (he can blink in there!). They've also been asking a lot of questions about how the baby is going to get out. We are pretty open with them. They've already started to pray for a comfortable and safe delivery.

Two days ago Ammon was saying his personal prayers and he started out saying, "Please let the baby pop out of mom soon." There were a few more pop requests, and then suddenly it turned to, "Please help mom to not hurt when she poops out the baby." I was trying so hard not to laugh! But for a 3 year old, that is not a bad understanding! I am basically going to poop out a nine pound baby. No wonder it's uncomfortable. 

Also, apparently my kids haven't told their teachers that they are going to have a new baby, and the teachers are starting to stare at my belly....I can tell they want to ask me if it is what they think it is when I go in each week to eat lunch with the kids. Yesterday one of Logan's teachers came up to me as we were leaving. She talked to Ammon for a few minutes, gave him a high-five, then said, "So do you just have 3 kids?" (Referring to Madi, Logan, and Ammon.) I told her that Grant was in first grade, and I could see her glance at my belly, so I said circled it and said, "And this little boy makes five!" Wow five! I know! I don't mind the surprise and comments, though. I just say, "Yep! We love them all! The more the merrier!"

I'm feeling pretty good. It is starting to get harder to bend over and to get up and down from the floor. When I walk too quickly or for too long (my exercise of choice) I get cramps on my right side underbelly. 

August (is that really going to be his name?!) is filling out my body and I can feel limbs scraping against my sides. I rub my belly and poke him back. (This is probably my favorite thing about being pregnant.) I wonder what he thinks as he hears the chaos of his brothers and sister...and mom and dad trying to talk over them. What a crazy, loud family he is coming to, full of people who will love and spoil him! 

We have a tentative moving date--hooray! I am looking forward to being able to prepare for this little guy's arrival. 

Week 12

First of all, I asked four different people in my family to take a picture of me, and this was the best they got. They are going to work on getting the camera (phone) in focus, and I'm going to work on reapplying eyeliner.

Based on the viewpoint, I believe that Grant took this winning picture. When I explained why I wanted a picture he said, "You don't even look fat. Just tall." Thanks buddy. Just wait.

Next up is a picture Madison took. She, too, won my favor by saying, "You don't look any different, Mom." I am only putting her photo on here because it's one of the few pictures I have ever had taken of me where I look like I have boobs. Oh pregnancy body, Thank You for this gift you've given me! 

Aside from queasy evenings, I'm feeling well. My kids all got a stomach bug this week and dear husband got up with them and cleaned up after them. Being pregnant has some perks! 

I know it's super early for this, but I swear I can feel the baby moving! Not often, and only when I'm still and things are quiet (so that's reaally not often), but after four babies....I'm pretty sure the popcorn feeling in my lower belly is baby. That is definitely the very best part of growing a human. 

the scoop

I am officially 11 weeks pregnant today. And because I know many of you are wondering (and a few have asked)--yes. We absolutely wanted this baby. That doesn't mean I'm not scared--I'm terrified. But we are very excited to invite another spirit into our home. And I feel giddy when I think of all the family get togethers that await me 20 years from now. 

We kept the pregnancy very quiet--partly because I savor the secret, and partly because after my miscarriage in April I felt terrified of it happening again. My first ob appointment was yesterday (I didn't even call the doctor until I got past the point I was in April when I miscarried, and I got a lecture for it, too). We wanted to take an announcement picture on Sunday because we all looked nice for church, and because I knew that once I got a good report that I would want to celebrate with family and friends. 

Of course, that meant we had to explain to the kids why we wanted them to line up by birth order. Joe said, "Say what number of kid you are." Then when he got to me he asked me what number I was. "Five!" The kids were so confused, saying things like, "Mom's not a kid!" Finally, they got it, and started asking a million questions about gender and names and dates and what it feels like. Basically, I'm going to be answering a lot of questions over the next 6 months!

Also, Madison likes to touch my belly and talk to the baby, and it takes a lot of willpower to not push her away and say, "stop touching me!!!" ...I try to do/say it nicely....

Anyway, Sunday evening we sent the picture to our families and made some phone calls. I'm glad we did, because it was nice having that support and knowing that there were a few people who knew I was going to the dr--which meant if something went wrong, I had people to confide in--whereas last time I did not tell anyone until after it happened, and when you go through something like that you need support! 

Joe still claims it would be fun to keep it a secret the entire 9 months and then post a picture of the baby, but he's not the one getting big and fat (can't keep that a secret!), and besides that, these next 6 1/2 months I am going to celebrate with anyone who will celebrate with me!!

I confided in Ammon shortly after we found out we were expecting. He's three, and surely had no idea what mommy was talking about when she said she had a baby in her tummy. 

Wrong. A friend took him to the park one day shortly after I had pulled a muscle in my ribs and could hardly move. She told me a few days later that  Ammon had "spilled the beans." I guess the lesson is to never trust a 3 year old with secrets. 

Obviously, my doctor's appointment went well. There is a baby and a heartbeat! The baby was dancing around the entire time, and if you look closely you can see the profile with a little tiny nose. 

The other question I have been asked is whether or not I want a boy or a girl. And the answer surprises me--I really don't care. I wanted another girl for so long, but now I know boys, and it's kind of special to just have my Madi. I admit that girls' hair bows and dresses are adorable, though. I am leaving it up to my Heavenly Father; He knows what our family needs, and whatever we get is what I want. 

It's kind of crazy to think that if I hadn't miscarried that I would be having a baby in a few weeks. I thought that the holidays would be a sad reminder that we didn't have that baby, but again--I know it was part of the plan, and I look forward to this life that will join us in May instead. Also, I'm probably a lot more comfortable right now than I would be otherwise (though it's only delayed)!

Every pregnancy has been different for me. I don't get very sick, thank goodness. I have thrown up a total of 3 times with 6 pregnancies (knock on wood). With Logan I felt sick with smells or disgusting visuals (once when we were on a walk Joe spit on the ground and I started gagging). With Madison I gagged everytime I brushed my teeth. This time I feel pretty good, but when dinnertime and evening come around, I feel awful! I don't throw up, but I think if I did I would feel better! I wonder if it's just because I'm tired in the evening. To combat it, I just go to bed, and Joe has been so good to get the kids to bed by himself most nights. I am able to fall asleep quickly, fortunately, but unfortunately, I wake up around 3-4 every morning and am unable to go back to sleep. By the time I get everyone off to school I am beat! I'm not complaining, though. This is part of the experience, and especially because I'm 99.99% sure this is the last time I will have this experience, I am going to savor it. Every minute!