Saturday, July 16, 2011

Thank You All.

It's just past midnight here in Dallas. I got up at 3:30 am to soothe Ammon so that Jenny could rest before she woke up at 5:00 to leave for PA at 6:00. It's been a long day.

But throughout this long day I've thought long and hard about the small milestone our marriage made yesterday (the 14th). I also thought deeply about the influences in our lives that have enabled me to live a fantastic dream this past decade, and helped Jenny cope with the nightmare. The trick? You.

From our earliest days Jenny and I have observed you couples around us so that we could pattern our marriage after the successes we have seen you enjoy. From China where we knew only one American couple (a returned mission president who told us about the comical fights they had been in); to Rexburg where our marriage incubated with other newlyweds nearby and the Chinese professor that forced Jenny to marry me; to Provo where we were surrounded by married couples in almost the exact life situation we were in; to Cleveland--and Akron/Canton--where we interacted with yet more young families; to Dallas--Rowlett and now Little Elm--where we interact with a diverse lineup of families.

At every stop along the way we have seen tremendous marriages. We have seen people successfully handle difficult children, we've seen people handle tragedy, we have seen them handle pain, and we have seen them grow. We've seen how you teach your children, how you split chores, how you court each other, and how you balance your lives.

Our favorite past time is to talk about you (not in the gossipy way), and about how much we can learn. We've learned so much. And those lessons you have taught us have made these past ten years for Jenny and I much more fulfilling and meaningful.

My only regret is that I cannot name names in this post. There are simply too many of you, and I would positively leave someone out.

So, thank you. Seriously. Thank you.

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Ten is Good



Ten years ago we did not have a cell phone, a digital camera, and any idea where we'd be today. Our anniversary is not actually until Thursday, but things are about to get even crazier around here, so I decided to take this opportunity to tell you a a little about this dude.

He's made quite a few funny posts about how we met, but this is the REAL story.

I took a Mandarin Chinese 101 class and noticed Joe sitting a few seats away. Actually, I noticed that he was a guy that had been in a class I had been in during the summer semester. I had about 30 seconds to decide if I was going to a.) pretend I had never seen him before or b.) ask him how he did in that class. I chose option b, which ended up being an embarrassing situation because he said something like, "Oh. Were you in that class?"

I will now explain what our first impressions of each other were. Mine of Joe: he talks a lot (which is why I knew who he was) and Joe's of me: she's a snob (because I am quiet and shy--which is why he didn't know who I was). I will let you make your own conclusions. :)

It just so happens that both us had roommates in this Mandarin 101 class, so for some reason or another (which I will keep confidential, but if you ask me in person I will tell you) the four of us became friends. We studied together sometimes and after a while my roommate and I would go to Joe for boy advice. One conversation which sticks out is the one we had about why we had taken Mandarin 101. I had just taught a semester in China and desired to learn the language so I could return. Joe's response was, "So I can talk to my wife." I just like to give him a hard time about that. :)

Anyway, 10 years later we've accomplished 5 degrees together, held too many jobs to count, lived in 5 states and more apts and homes than that, had 3 vehicles, and I guess the only numbers that really matter are these 4 children we made together. I swore we'd never live in Texas, and here we are, and loving it!

In honor of the BIG TEN I thought I'd get somewhat mushy and tell you 10 things about the awesome guy who made this number possible.

1. Joe is a hard worker. He got his college job by just showing up at an event and asking the sound crew if he could help them. I think they gave him a job later that evening. Towards the end of our time at BYU-Idaho he worked 3 different jobs at the same time while I student taught and then stayed home with Logan. I knew it was important to him to provide for his family, and I have seen that same discipline and dedication as he applied to law schools, sent out resumes, and now as he continues to build his law practice.

2. Joe is a good dad. We had a conversation on our first date that let me know that children were important to him, and that he intended to be there and to spend time with them. I am happy to report that our children adore and look up to him, and let's be honest--they'd much rather play with him than me.

3. Joe cooks. That is how he initially lured me in. He cooked for me. Then he cooked for my family when they came to visit. These days I do most of the cooking because I'm the one who is home. . . but when he gets the chance, Joe is the one who makes us crepes, enchiladas, and Mexican rice. . . just to name a few of his specialties.

4. Joe cleans. He knows that I get a little crazy around messes. So some of my favorite days include the ones where I'm about to go crazy and he says, "Why don't you take a nap and I'll take care of everything." This phrase usually means I wake up to a clean house and sweet smells of dinner.

5. Joe is smart. He knows a little bit (sometimes a lot) about everything. Sometimes it's very random. When we first got married I would get him to tickle my neck/back while he would tell me history stories that I should have learned in high school. The conversation never gets stale around here. :)

6. Joe is good with people. This goes back a little to how he is smart and how he talks a lot. He just knows how to talk to people. Me--not so much. When he first proposed the idea of starting his own law practice I knew that he might actually be able to pull it off because he was so good at making people like him.

7. Joe is funny and optimistic and laid back (read the sidebar). All things I'm not. He has a great sense of humor, which actually sometimes infuriates me because I am so serious and pessimistic. We even each other out, and truly--if there is a bad situation you might as well be happy about it.

8. Joe lets me be the boss. We are both first children, which can be interesting at times. But probably more than he should, he lets me call the shots. I think part of it is because he is afraid of me getting mad. :) For example, we were scheduled to get married in August of 2001. I got a phone call a few months before and was offered a job supervising 15 teachers in China. I explained that I couldn't because I was getting married in August right around the day they wanted me to be there. They suggested we move up our wedding date and they would pay for Joe to go, too. That night we had a conversation that went like this, "What would you think about getting married in July and going to live in China for a semester in August?" Joe thought for a few minutes and said that if that is what I wanted to do we could do it. We've had many repeat conversations.

9. Joe is serviceable. Not just for me or my family, as you can clearly see in above examples. He truly cares about people and wants to help them. I see this in the work he does and in our family. We both agree that we should be more service-oriented.

10. Joe is spiritual. Two months before we got married I went home to spend some time with my family. He would send me letters in the mail almost everyday, and he would always share his testimony. While I don't love early morning church meetings or lonely evenings while he is out with the missionaries, etc., I love being able to tell our children that he is fulfilling his church callings and priesthood duties.

Joseph, buddy, I can't even begin to think about where we will be in 10 years. I know it will go faster than I ever dreamed possible. Logan will be getting ready to graduate from high school, and that is just CRAZY!! I do know that wherever we will be, we will be OK. Thanks for putting up with me!